Let’s explore four bad language habits that can ruin us. The words we habitually use can significantly influence a person’s beliefs, thoughts, actions, and emotions. Did you know that unconscious bad language habits can create self-imposed limits and lead to feelings of helplessness? If my speech habits are negatively affecting me, it’s necessary to change them. In this article, we’ll explore three common bad language habits that people exhibit.
1. The impact of language habits on humans
Jack Canfield, famous for “Chicken Soup for the Soul,” is known as an entrepreneur, author, and speaker. Jack Canfield has researched the reasons behind people’s success and published his findings, stating that language habits are a critical factor in success.
He has a list of words that those aspiring for success should avoid, and he strives to adhere to this list himself. Unknowingly, language habits can have a significant impact on a person.
Not only Jack Canfield, but many scholars have studied the relationship between language habits and an individual’s psychological health, thoughts, and actions.
Bad language habits can affect a person in various ways, so it is crucial to be mindful.
2. Four bad language habits
Let’s look at four bad language habits introduced by Jack Canfield and Dave Asprey. These are referred to as “weasel words” in Dave Asprey’s book “Game Changer.”
1) I can’t
The first bad language habit, saying “I can’t,” implies that there is no possibility of achieving something, blocking personal strength, potential, and innovative thinking.
Whether intentionally or not, the words you use can be interpreted differently by your conscious and subconscious minds. Even if you consciously say you can’t do something, your subconscious might misunderstand, so caution is needed.
Saying “I can’t” might mean you need help, there’s currently no way, you don’t know how to do it, or you don’t want to do it. However, if you have sufficient resources and creative problem-solving skills, you can achieve anything.
Repeating “I can’t” can lead your brain to focus on the impossibility of a solution, even when a solution is feasible. It’s much better to focus on how something is possible.
Tip) Try not to use the phrase "I can't" for a week and instead repeat affirmations that you can!
2) Need
The second bad language habit, using the word “need,” can confine problem-solving to a subconscious framework, cause stress to the subconscious, and limit creativity.
The human brain, though a product of evolution, still retains primitive habits from prehistoric times. Whether it’s a thought or an imagination, if it’s perceived as a threat to survival, it triggers a fight-or-flight response, altering our body’s systems.
In this context, the word “need” can also be perceived by our brain as a survival issue, and the primitive brain, governing instincts, might perceive the absence of something as a life-threatening situation.
We should use the word “need” only when we are 100% certain, and otherwise, we can replace it with words that express desire, choice, or decision.
Especially if you are in a leadership position, saying there is a need to do something can cause team members’ brains to instinctively perceive danger, making it difficult for them to focus on truly important goals.
Example of need)
Dave Asprey suggests, instead of telling his team members that they need to meet deadlines, he says it’s important, we can do well, and asks what obstacles need to be removed or what help is needed.
Thus, even if deadlines are missed, creating a situation where honest discussions can happen is necessary, rather than using the word “need” and stressing the team unnecessarily.
Tip) Try to live without using the word "need" for a week. If you use the word, consider setting up a penalty, such as a fine!
3) Bad
The third bad language habit, “bad,” can lead to dichotomous thinking (black-and-white logic) and excessively negative thoughts and emotions.
Essentially, there are not many things that can inherently be described as “bad,” and judging something as bad is often a value judgment stemming from an individual’s beliefs and thoughts.
If we judge ordinary daily occurrences based on notions of good and bad, it can limit our thinking and trigger unnecessary negative emotions and thoughts. Evaluating something as “bad” might cause us to overlook its advantages.
Tip) When evaluating a person, situation, or object, try to find only the good aspects. Look for something to learn from each person!
4) Try
The fourth bad language habit, “try,” inherently contains the possibility of failure, which can lead to easily giving up and failing.
For example, if you were traveling to a foreign country and your friend living there said, “I’ll try to come to the airport to meet you,” you would probably think it more likely that they wouldn’t show up.
Dave Asprey emphasizes that to become a better human being, one should not give oneself excuses to fail and must push the brain to fully realize its potential.
This does not mean that one must accomplish everything; rather, it means that tasks considered not worth your time and energy should be honestly and clearly refused. However, when you decide to do something, you should pour all your capabilities into it.
Tip) There is no "try," only "do." Abandon the habit of saying "I'll try!"
3. Author’s Thoughts
The author has a keen interest in the unconscious mind that unknowingly controls us. This has led to a fascination with the principles of psychology and neuroscience.
According to psychology and neuroscience, our unwitting language habits are not just mere words but are connected to beliefs about oneself, others, and the world formed since childhood.
Unwitting language habits are linked to unwitting thoughts, which, if excessive, can lead to depression, anxiety, or anger.
For instance, people who often think and say they are bad tend to suffer from depression; those who think and say the future will be bad are prone to anxiety; and those who believe others have treated them badly are susceptible to anger disorders.
Therefore, having bad language habits can not only harm one’s mental health but also distance oneself from desired life goals and objectives. If you aspire to a certain lifestyle or goals, consider correcting your bad language habits first!
4. Conclusion and Q&A
We’ve explored four bad language habits you might be unknowingly using: “I can’t,” “need,” “bad,” and “try.” These habits can hinder living the life we desire and should generally be avoided. Below, we’ll address some frequently asked questions and key points.
1) What are the bad language habits?
In “Game Changer” by Dave Asprey, the four key bad language habits identified are saying “I can’t,” “need,” “bad,” and “I’ll try.”
2) What impact do these bad language habits have?
Saying “I can’t” eliminates possibilities, “need” limits creativity, “bad” creates biases, and “I’ll try” increases the likelihood of failure.
These habits are predominantly negative and efforts should be made to adopt a more positive language habit. This involves constantly looking for the positive aspects and learning from others.
3) How can one avoid bad language habits?
Eliminating existing habits may require effort for over three months. Initially, a one-week trial to consciously avoid these habits can be a good start. Implementing penalties, such as fines, when slipping back into these habits can also be effective.
Language habits are ultimately just habits. Understanding how habits are formed can greatly assist in developing positive language habits. Consider exploring further readings on habit formation linked below!
► References and Additional Reading Materials
[Book] “Game Changer” – Dave Asprey / Business Books Publishing
[Book] “Manual for Overcoming Panic Disorder” – Choi Young-hee / Hakjisa
[Book] “One Day Panic Arrived” – Klaus Bernhardt / Flow Publishing
– Be the Titan Brain
